Let’s Talk Suicide 


We need to talk about suicide. And I mean really talk openly about it. None of the hushed up whispering about it, pussy-footing around the subject. Fuck stigma. People are dying. Every single day, we lose someone. Because we won’t talk about the word suicide. 

Medical Definition of suicide. 1: the act or an instance of taking one’s own life voluntarily and intentionally. 2: a person who commits or attempts suicide.

Suicide | Definition of Suicide by Merriam-Webster

The dictionary itself is wrong. Who in the fuck voluntarily and intentionally takes their own life? As a survivor of two serious attempts, I can tell you that I wasn’t voluntarily taking my own life. I just wanted the horrific emotional pain and suffering that I was feeling inside to stop. The pain that nobody else could seem to understand. That no drug could seem to soothe. 

Who decided that people who were in such emotional pain and sufferring were voluntarily taking their lives? Who put that shame on the families left behind or on those who survived an attempt like myself? What kind of a society shuns someone for just wanting relief from unbearable pain?

I used to hold my head low when I would mention that I had “attempted” in the past, allowing myself to take on the burden of society’s shame and invalidating my illness as a result. Now, I speak of those attempts as openly and as freely as they always should have been talked about. They were times when I felt completely hopeless and desperate and alone. By sharing my experiences it lets others know that people can make it through the storm and they’re not alone. 

When we as a society can discuss suicide as openly and frankly as we can talk about other previously taboo topics we will seriously start saving lives. We have to stop the shaming that people keep insisting be thrown upon those who live with the suicidal ideations, those who have lost someone to the illness, and those who have survived. 

Let’s talk. 

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About wendyenberg

Living the best life I can with BPD, Major Depressive Disorder, Anxiety and PTSD. Mental illness won't stop me from achieving my dreams - it will inspire me to keep fighting harder.
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10 Responses to Let’s Talk Suicide 

  1. crazysobergirl says:

    This post is so spot on! I hate the stigma of suicide and mental illness, it infuriates me! Great post by the way!

    • wendyenberg says:

      Thanks!! I hate how people don’t even want us to talk about our experiences and want us to be ashamed.

      • crazysobergirl says:

        Exactly! I’m not ashamed of who I am nor what I have been through. The purpose of my blog is to share my experiences so that others can know they aren’t alone. Seeing other people struggling with the same stuff I am really helps me to feel better about myself.

      • Paul Lamb says:

        They don’t want us to talk about them because THEY do not want to feel uncomfortable.

  2. “Who in the fuck voluntarily and intentionally takes their own life?” – I do, and many others.

    I don’t know your story, but I know mine and others like me. We escaped to unknown message boards because of ideas like yours.

    We were born into this world without the option of consent. Circumstances, genes and other factors lead us to find life pointless. We don’t want to live for the same reason you don’t want to have sex with that guy. We just don’t feel like it, so what?

    Life isn’t valueable in and of itself. You cannot claim whether someone’s life is bad or good, worth living or not because you don’t live their life.

    We can’t talk about suicide while demonizing the thoughts of suicide and telling suicidal people how horrible we are for thinking so. It’s our bodies and our life.

    If you can’t respect our desires, how can we trust you?

  3. JL says:

    I’ve been having more and more serious thoughts on suicide. And all I hear are, “Think about your loved ones. How will they feel if you died?” and I cry my eyes out when I do hear comments like that because I feel so alone. I feel like no one understands how I feel. Of course I’ve thought about how my loved ones will feel. I’ve thought about all those things. But isn’t doesn’t negate the fact that I feel so distressed that life is meaningless and painful to me. I just want this to stop. What about how I feel?

    At one point, I went to the top floor of the parking garage in college and looked down. I seriously contemplated jumping but then a fear washed over me. What if I survive but barely? What if I only just get severely injured and recover but in a worse condition than before? At that moment, I felt so alone. I tried to reach out to my friend but she thought I was kidding around so I gave up trying to find help. I stood at the top floor of the parking garage for an hour, just thinking, crying… I finally talked myself down. The rational and emotionally stronger part of me reached out and walked me back down to the ground floor. Then I met a friend that I really respected (he is my manager at the Math Assistance Center). We talked for a little and then he gave me the heartiest hug I’ve ever experienced. Somehow, he just knew I needed it. That helped me more than he will ever realize.

    But yeah…. People who think about suicide feel so alone and the pain is so bad that it sometimes feel like we can’t breathe. Yet, no one wants to know how we really feel or even ask how they can really help. Instead, they pile on more guilt on us and make us bear the shame and guilt of leaving our family or loved ones behind.

  4. Mary says:

    Thank you for writing this!! It is so true!!

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