A journey begins with just one step. There are some days that I wake up and my depression feels like it’s got me held tightly in its clenches and I just lay there, not wanting to move. My mind just thinks of how much easier it would be to just not fight it anymore and succumb to the will of the illness but inside of me there’s a voice that whispers, “Just one step”. I can handle one step. I don’t have to think of the whole day ahead of me and get overwhelmed by what that means….I just have to think of putting my feet on the ground and taking that one step.
That one step always leads to another. When I look at the bigger picture, I sometimes feel afraid of failing. It’s too much for me to even imagine getting through an entire day, so instead, I just get through that step. It’s been helpful for me to break down my days into a set of small manageable tasks and even then, I break those down. And then I celebrate being able to do those little tasks to build myself up to carry on with just one more step.
For example, just making it to the kitchen and making lunches for my family counts as a huge success. Once everyone is gone for the morning, I reward myself by reading my social media and connecting with others. By constantly showing myself compassion, I’m learning to work with my depression and despite her wanting to hold me back, I continue to take those steps.
Just one step. That’s all. I can handle one step.