Emotional Neglect

Childhood Emotional Neglect happens when a parent fails to notice or respond enough to a child’s emotional needs. – 

The Invisible Power of Childhood Emotional Neglect

Emotional neglect can lead to feelings of emptiness and disconnection
Published on August 22, 2013 by Randi Kreger in Stop Walking on Eggshells
 
A child whose feelings are too often unnoticed, ignored, or misinterpreted by her parents receives a powerful, even if unintended, message from them: “Your feelings don’t matter,” “Your feelings are wrong,” or even“Your feelings are unacceptable.”
 
Above is an excerpt taken from the article published by Randi Kreger. Since stumbling across the article, it has created a lot of thoughts in my head about this topic.  As a child, my emotional needs were not met and I struggle today with the feelings of emptiness and disconnect. When you spend your formative years experiencing this type of neglect, it leads to powerful consequences as an adult.  I do feel like my feelings are wrong or unacceptable, and struggle to accept them for what they are – a message to myself. 
 
“Stop that crying or I’ll give you something to cry about”,  a phrase I heard many times in my childhood.  So here was a little girl, obviously feeling sad or hurt and being told to STOP THOSE FEELINGS and replace them with nothing.  So i learned to push away feelings and reject them…..which in turn led to emotional dysregulation as an adult.  Today when I feel things like sadness or hurt, I stuff the feelings and hear the inner voice telling me that I’m wrong or bad to feel that way.  This leads to me playing the “blame and shame” game and I’m transported back emotionally to that little girl that just wants someone to let her know that her feelings are valid and ok to be having.  That’s what makes us human is the ability to FEEL.  
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About wendyenberg

Living the best life I can with BPD, Major Depressive Disorder, Anxiety and PTSD. Mental illness won't stop me from achieving my dreams - it will inspire me to keep fighting harder.
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