A Thin Thin Thread

ImageI have to admit that I’ve been hanging on by this thin thin thread for awhile now and I’m terrified that it’s going to snap and all that I’ve been working towards and building on during my recovery will fall to the ground and scatter, leaving me to pick up the pieces again and start over.  I’ve started over so many times that I no longer no what it’s like to finish something. Each time another weight is added to the thread, I’m convinced that it’s going to break and I cringe in anticipation. 

What is this thread that is holding on?  Is it determination? Willpower? Stubbornness? Is it strong enough to bear the burdens that I place upon it? Having been ill for so long surely must be hard on that thread…..what more could it possibly withstand?

All I can do is hope that it doesn’t break. And if it does break, know that I have the strength within me to gather up all those bits that are me and put them back together again, this time using a stronger thread perhaps. Woven into the tapestry of our lives are all these broken and repaired threads, somehow holding together this person that is me. 

 

 

Advertisements

About wendyenberg

Living the best life I can with BPD, Major Depressive Disorder, Anxiety and PTSD. Mental illness won't stop me from achieving my dreams - it will inspire me to keep fighting harder.
This entry was posted in Uncategorized and tagged , , . Bookmark the permalink.

2 Responses to A Thin Thin Thread

  1. Hi there, sometimes, like you say, when we’re ill for a long amount of time, it can be difficult judging some things can’t it. Best wishes.

  2. wendyenberg says:

    Thanks – yes sometimes the illness really clouds my judgement.

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s